Things Stressed Women Say at Work...

Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you.

You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.

Well, this day was a total waste of make up.

Well, aren't we a damn ray of sunshine?

Do I look like a people person?

This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.

I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.

Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.

Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?

Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.

Do they ever shut up on your planet?

Back off!! You're standing in my aura.

Don't worry, I forgot your name too.

I work 45 hours a week to be this poor.

Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

Wait...I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

Chaos, panic and disorder...my work here is done.

Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.

You look like shit. Is that the style now?

Earth is full. Go home.

Aw, did I step on your poor little itty bitty ego?

You are depriving some village of an idiot.

If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.

Look in my eyes...do you see one ounce of gives-a-shit?

Here I am, frustrated because nobody around here is worth choking to death.

Hmm...only if I was so quick to whip one of these up when an occasion presents itself...I'd be less stressed (Honestly, I am not that stressed, just found this amusing) and more feared.

But, recylcing (as we all know) is good for environment...so grab one of these and use them as need be. Our contribution to conservation!